Jen told me from early on in our relationship that she would like to have ten children, while I told her I’d be happy with three. Like most things in our life we compromised, though she keeps getting closer to her number 😃
This past year has been yet another of ups, downs, and surprises, but as always things seem to end up where they should be. Maybe I’ve always been this way, but as I get older I feel like I can get stuck in my own ways and that it takes me longer to come around mentally to changes.
When our oldest Alex told us she was pregnant it was one of those times that it took me a while to come around. It felt like she was falling into a long line of our family having a child young when we weren’t really ready or in a great place to do so. Alex has been working through mental health issues and learning disabilities, we try to do what our parents did for us and set her, and all our children, up on at least a bit of a better starting point then we started on. I knew being a single Mom at such a point in life was going to make things even more difficult for her, so when we first heard the news it was hard for me to be happy. In fact I’m not proud to say that when the discussion around what Ezra would call Jen and I came up my family thought it would be hilarious if he called me Grumpa instead of Grandpa.
Thankfully I came around and of course we did all we could to support Alex during the pregnancy and after Ezra was born. I quickly began to love the idea of being a Grandfather and having a new baby around to maybe spoil a little, but then be able to send back to Alex.
When Ezra was about a year an a half a number of things came to a head and he came to stay with us full time. The initial plan was for it to be while Alex got the help she needed and worked on herself. This yet again was one of those times where it took me a while to wrap my head around another big change. I was loving the Grandfather role and the place we were in life, and I could see that our lives and plans were going to be changed yet again.
After a while Alex made the hard but mature decision that her process wasn’t going to be an overnight thing and it would be best for Ezra if he was with us permanently. We started the process of adopting him.
Things have certainly changed and it made some things more difficult, but we love Ezra and having him with us always. Our other kids were on board right from the beginning and, just like everything else, they are amazing, loving, and helpful with him. We also now have added to our immediate families list of Fall celebrations. Noah’s, Alex’s, Caile’s, Ezra’s, and my birthday, and now the day the adoption became official!
Though there were times through this process where I was selfish and spent too long looking at the negative side of the changes, I know I’m so extremely lucky and blessed. I’m not sure what I’ve done in life to deserve it but I have the most awesome family, friends, and career, all full of support and love. I’m so glad that Ezra is right here with us and surrounded by all of this as well.