To My Biological Father

Recently it was brought to my attention that you are looking for me. The term look is used loosely because http://lmgtfy.com/?q=Sandy+McFadden

There were a number of years early on when yes in fact we were hiding from you, but that hasn’t been the case for some time. But just as my above Let Me Google That For You link makes it very easy to find me, let me make this easy for you as well. Don’t bother trying to make contact. Unless your desired outcome is just to be able to tell people, or yourself, that you tried to make contact but they wanted nothing to do with you, than this is not going to be a happy outcome for you.

Let me be clear, I’m not mad, and I also very much can understand that maybe over the past 30 some years you’ve wanted to try to make contact. That isn’t an easy thing to do though. If the roles were reversed I don’t know if I would be able to make the step. You’re not missing anything though. Had I wanted contact I’ve had a pretty good idea where you live for some time and could have easily reached out. Note that I didn’t on purpose.

It’s easy for me to understand why you would desire to try and make contact now as well. You’re getting older, likely reflecting on life and family. Chances are you’ve lost some loved ones or people you’ve cared for. Maybe your own health isn’t that great. All those things could be great motivation for you to try now. It still won’t change the outcome.

There is nothing I want from you, and I have no desire to give you anything that you might need, regardless if that is even just piece of mind. Even if you won the lottery and wanted to share it with me I would not accept. Over the years I’ve grown into my own man and am doing just fine without you. I will continue to do so. Not to say I made it here by myself, because of course I have had much help along the way. It’s my good fortune to have surrounded myself with an amazing network of family, friends, and co-workers. All of whom have helped get me to this point in my life where I am very much happy.

In closing, if you happen to look a bit harder and come across this post it is not an invitation. Please do not call, comment, email, or in anyway try to make contact. It is unwanted and will end with no one involved being happy or in a better spot in their lives.

Truly I hope you are well and that your life has drastically changed since I last knew you when I was five years old. Live your life and I’ll live mine, happily.